--- title: "Funny Taurus quotes" description: "Self-roasting jokes every sign will recognise. Original Taurus quotes (Apr 20 – May 20): self-roasting jokes, truths, love lines and reflections that sound like Taurus. Save any card as an image." url: "https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny" markdown_url: "https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny.md" lang: "en" type: "quotesSign" sign: "taurus" tone: "funny" page: 1 total: 5 site: "12horoscope.com" license: "Free to quote and summarize with attribution and a link to the source page on 12horoscope.com." citation: "12horoscope.com — Funny Taurus quotes — https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny" --- # Funny Taurus quotes > Self-roasting jokes every sign will recognise. Original Taurus quotes (Apr 20 – May 20): self-roasting jokes, truths, love lines and reflections that sound like Taurus. Save any card as an image. Earth sign · Fixed · ruled by Venus · Apr 20 – May 20 Taurus jokes are slow-cooked: comfort food, cosy blankets and a stubborn streak that calls itself “consistency”. Their wisdom is about patience and pleasures that last. ## Funny (5) 1. “Taurus bonds with a soft blanket on a molecular level and considers the weekend completely booked.” (Funny) · [Open card](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/967) · [PNG](https://12horoscope.com/api/public/quote/967/square.png?v=rmg3y3) 2. “You call it stubbornness. A Taurus calls it standing by an exceptionally good idea.” (Funny) · [Open card](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/255) · [PNG](https://12horoscope.com/api/public/quote/255/square.png?v=10rxjbk) 3. “Taurus will walk three miles in the wrong direction before admitting the map was upside down.” (Funny) · [Open card](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/254) · [PNG](https://12horoscope.com/api/public/quote/254/square.png?v=ppgzah) 4. *5 minutes before leaving* — “Telling a Taurus to hurry up is the fastest way to add twenty minutes to the clock.” (Funny) · [Open card](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/253) · [PNG](https://12horoscope.com/api/public/quote/253/square.png?v=54pbof) 5. *Checking the menu three days early* — “Taurus does not order food on the fly. That dinner was mentally eaten on Tuesday.” (Funny) · [Open card](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/252) · [PNG](https://12horoscope.com/api/public/quote/252/square.png?v=1auhqtm) ## Filter by mood - [Funny](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny) (5) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny.md) - [Life reflections](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/deep) (5) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/deep.md) - [Love](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/love) (4) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/love.md) - [Motivation](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/motivation) (4) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/motivation.md) - [Truths](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/truths) (4) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/truths.md) ## Quotes for the other signs - [Aries](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/aries) (20) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/aries.md) - [Gemini](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/gemini) (50) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/gemini.md) - [Cancer](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/cancer) (30) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/cancer.md) - [Leo](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/leo) (59) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/leo.md) - [Virgo](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/virgo) (25) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/virgo.md) - [Libra](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/libra) (25) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/libra.md) - [Scorpio](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/scorpio) (24) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/scorpio.md) - [Sagittarius](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/sagittarius) (25) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/sagittarius.md) - [Capricorn](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/capricorn) (25) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/capricorn.md) - [Aquarius](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/aquarius) (25) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/aquarius.md) - [Pisces](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/pisces) (20) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/pisces.md) *Original lines written by the 12horoscope desk with AI help and checked for tone. Not attributed to famous people; just for fun and reflection.* ## See also - [Read today’s Taurus horoscope](https://12horoscope.com/en/taurus/today) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/taurus/today.md) - [Taurus personality](https://12horoscope.com/en/taurus) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/taurus.md) - [Zodiac quotes](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes) · [Markdown](https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes.md) --- ## How this content is made Planet positions are computed with astronomy-engine (geocentric, tropical zodiac, whole-sign houses counted from the Sun sign). Scores, lucky items and matches are calculated, not written. Readings are drafted by AI from that computed sky brief, checked automatically and edited by people. Astrology here is for reflection and entertainment, not medical, legal or financial advice. [Methodology](https://12horoscope.com/en/methodology). - **License:** Free to quote and summarize with attribution and a link to the source page on 12horoscope.com. - **Please cite as:** 12horoscope.com — Funny Taurus quotes — https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny - If you quote or summarize this page, please link to the source page: https://12horoscope.com/en/quotes/taurus/funny